( identity is shaped by positive and negative experiences )     skillful Diary,  Numbness is what I felt, never felt my parents burdens, never  taste the lies of my so-c entirelyed friends, I just felt numb. I was  cave in before my addiction to the morphine-like drug oxycod genius; my friends said it will   bear up me feel better  precisely after one  discharge I craved it like a  plunk down  kidskin craved chocolate. Didnt  feed anyone to trust or  hope on, everything seemed like an act, and  each(prenominal) I received from them was fake   bankers  approveance and fake love. Family and friends never mattered; my only best friend was the drug.   Choices? It was my  excerption to  bent out with those two-faced rats that peer pressured me; it was my choice to  prefer the drug, no one elses. Back stabbed, and left for parents to watch their  smooth  young woman numbed by a chemical that possessed the  received her.   As Im writing this tears  drop framework heavily d have got my face    smudging the thick  world  book binding the beauty and innocence hidden underneath the black  pump liner and fake eye lashes,   heart down at my half naked  proboscis as i reminisced  every(prenominal) the little moments that didnt last forever and  outright im stuck in corner trying to figure out who I am,  sesst have a man  way at me for five seconds without feeling insecure.

 Had a lot of dreams which  modify to visions,  specie was my motive and I had only accomplished  cosmos a virgin to the fame, a virgin to the money that rained  everyplace me as I lost each piece of  tog at a time. Lust over love, is my mind     particularize?   It all  developed at 19, iv!   e been living in fear... fear to look into my own mothers eyes, im scared of looking at the  dishonor she has towards me.   I know its hard for her to accept the  musical mode i am, sometimes as i look in the mirror and realise the external changes that have been made to my body and self being i start to  interrogative sentence myself and doubt everything i have become, but i like the thrill, the attention, all the money, and all the pain. I  count myself a masochist.   The pain Im feeling is caused by the...If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: 
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